Monday, January 30, 2012

This PITA is becoming a real pain in the ass..

If you've been reading for awhile, you know that back in November I was diagnosed with a PITA.  What first appeared as lower back pain is actually a bit lower in my right cheek.  It began really cute and funny even...go look, 
I'll wait..

I was told not to vacuum or do much laundry (oh dread) and take it easy.  This condition came about without an injury that I'm aware of and they were first treating it as a muscle problem, using stretches, different exercises, and ice to loosen up the muscle only to result in not much improvement in pain.  I have relief the day of therapy, it feels great, I get my stuff done and the next day it feels like crap again. The first appointment was the only one where massage was used because quite frankly, who wants to rub my ass?  My husband, possibly on a good day and if there's sex involved.  If anyone knows of an ass specific massage therapist, please let me know...there is now a big demand for it.

After the first four weeks, I was re-evaluated and only had a 20% improvement in pain.  "That's not very much," I was told.  I wasn't gonna lie, it was a little better but it certainly wasn't gone by any means.

During the second four weeks, when I still told them it wasn't any better, suddenly maybe I needed traction.  Now it's no longer a muscle problem but a spine problem?  My first traction was on a Friday - Saturday was the worst day ever!  I could barely get out of bed and could not bend over without pain - a problem I didn't have when I started.  My mobility and flexibility have never been a problem. When I went back on Monday, told them how Saturday went and that I thought I was worse, I was told that it is supposed to get worse before it gets better. It was suggested that I do traction at least three times to give it a chance.  Who am I to refuse getting back into this contraption that in my opinion made me worse? 

If you aren't familiar with traction, they put you in a device put out on the table where you are strapped down twice above the waist and once below and the legs are elevated from the knee down.  The board that the bottom strap is holding you to moves down so as to stretch your spine and release the tension in between the vertebrae or relieve spinal decompression.  As far as I was told from the x-ray done at the beginning, there wasn't anything wrong with my spine and the spaces in between seemed fine so why this was considered an option I'm not really all that sure but I went along with it.  Who am I to say no to medical advice even though my body tells me different?

I have been through 8 weeks  - 2 rounds - of physical therapy to no avail.  I graduated as they call it but still don't really feel any better so today I am going to an orthopedic doctor to tell him the same story I've been telling since late September.  

I feel like a Barbie feels when her leg comes off and you can't quite get it back in.

I feel like the pain is more intense in transitions like when I get up from sitting or when I lay down. 

I feel like a broken record. 

I feel like my house has only been vacuumed once or twice in the last 2 months. 

I feel like I have been being treated for something they haven't gotten to the bottom of yet.  Is it a muscle? Is it the spine?  Can they really tell without further investigation?  Am I going to have to just live with this?

I am really hoping that this appointment will give me a better perspective or at least a glimmer of hope at finding out what the actual problem is.  Let's get to the bottom of the actual problem before we treat the symptoms.  I know if my pain doesn't subside soon, I may have to hire a maid...or just decide to cure it with my mind like Charlie Sheen.

Thanks for listening..


Mary H said...

That sucks! Nothing more to say than that. Have you tried an inversion board?

Kate F. @katefineske said...

That DOES sound like a pain in the ass :( Hope you get solved soon... or at very least get a maid! :)

Therobotmommy said...

We're such twins. Let's fly off to someplace tropical and lie around drinking! Whatcha say?

dakotapam said...

I'm so sorry. I can see why you would be frustrated!

CoffeeLovinMom said...

I have yet to try anything against medical advice including chiropractic which my sister keeps urging..

CoffeeLovinMom said...

Now I'm being told it IS the sciatic it went from being a muscle to possible spine now to nerve. That maid is sounding better and better!

CoffeeLovinMom said...

Seriously, next they will tell me this is why my libido is so low - which I swear is someplace tropical...let's go NOW!

CoffeeLovinMom said...

This doctor today was the most thorough of all the exams so far..I think I trust her that it's a nerve - I think...thanks Pam!

Sarcasm Goddess said...

Ugh. I am so sorry. Chronic pain sucks, especially when they can't even identify what is causing it. I hope you won't hate me for laughing at "If anyone knows of an ass specific massage therapist, please let me know...there is now a big demand for it." Feel better, friend!

Wilbur Coffee said...

I have had that same pain for the last 18 months and went to the doc a couple of times and was not satisfied with what they were telling me, because my body was telling me otherwise. one evening I was watching a Sinbad special and he did a routine about the same problem. He mentioned something about the piriformis muscle. So I googled it and found that there is a thing called piriformis syndrome which I believe is what I have. There are several stretching things that I have read about stretching that muscle. I have been doing them for about two weeks and I must say that I am feeling the best I have felt in months.

Jennifer Hall said...

That is very obnoxious and I'm really sorry. Pain from n apparent illness or injury is the worst to treat. The doctors never have any clue what's really going on. You know I feel your pain!

CoffeeLovinMom said...

Is there a link you can send me? This has been going on for too long now..thanks for the info!

CoffeeLovinMom said...

By big demand I mean BIG!