Sunday, August 14, 2011

What's Wrong With Me??

Do you need a list?  Probably would take too long.


I have numerous things that could be wrong with me just in any given day including but not limited to headaches, not enough caffeine, cramps, that knee thing, accidental paper cuts, broken nail, MY EYE!  

This could become a whole series of What's Wrong With Me..  

Being my own worse critic, that would be an easy thing to do..for me much easier than coming up with a list of fantastic things about me which I can totally come up with, of course, it would just take a little longer..and not so much of a series..more of a one hit wonder of sorts.  

If you ask most people that know me in real life and by most I mean the ones that call me on the phone, they will tell you that I don't answer the phone.


I don't.

Hardly ever.

My mom has left me messages including the word bitch.  Lovingly of course.
My sister pretty much quit calling.
People leave messages on my facebook wall telling me to call them.
My own relatives even.

I don't even want to know what my husband's family says...
Even my husband bitches at me, more about the fact that his mother thinks there is something wrong with me because I don't answer the phone..
I've been asked, "What's wrong with you that you can't answer the phone?"

It's pretty serious. 
People are actually surprised when I answer the phone, telling me they were ready to leave a's kind of like winning the lottery.

Even back in the day when I had my Swatch phone with two receivers and three way calling, I was just not that into it.  I never chatted on the phone for hours on end in high school -  my mom will probably tell you different because I remember being on a call and my dad unplugging the phone from the other room but that only happened once.

I have my reasons listed HERE

It really goes deeper than that and it's not even about who's calling. People get offended thinking I am targeting them or ignoring them because I don't like them only I do it to the people that I like just as often.  Once people realize it's NOT about them, we get along much better.  Look, if I don't have a half an hour to spend on the phone with someone and it's you who will definitely talk my ear off for at least that long, I am not picking up.  

That's it.  

I do not need to hear blah blah blah about your drama when I've got enough crap of my own to deal with.  Drama brings me down and if I'm sitting on the other end saying "Uh Huh" the whole time, it's not my cuppa joe.  It's a waste of my time and maybe I'm just talking to the wrong people.  I understand the need for a supportive friend on the other end - I have no problem doing that and lending an ear when needed but who put it in the rule book that I have to pick up every time the phone rings?  Is it written somewhere that there is something wrong with a person that doesn't pick up their phone on a regular basis?  There probably is and I just missed the memo like usual.  Maybe there is a support group I can join to help solve this obvious problem.

I cringe when my house phone rings because I don't have Caller ID anymore and 9 times out of 10, nobody is there when I do pick up..or it's a recorded message from some politician.  I have picked up my husband's cell phone while it's ringing and bring it to him, holding it like a foreign object in my hand.  I do not let the phone dictate what I am doing nor have I ever dropped everything to get to the phone.  Most times I'm just doing something better than talking on the phone - which reminds me I need a bumper sticker that reads: "I Would Rather Be Tweeting."

So THAT's what's wrong with least for most people that would be their #1 thing on the list.  I prefer to consider myself evasive. Not rude. I am sorry if this is offensive to you and maybe it makes me uncouth..Not to the point where there's something wrong with me.  If picking up the phone is wrong, I don't wanna be right.

What's Wrong With Me??

What's Wrong With YOU???

I think that answer depends on who you ask that question to.

Have you ever had this question asked about you or better yet to your face?
Who do you think has the longest list of What's Wrong With You?


coffeelovinmom said...

I bet that's a sight to be seen sometimes...I would call just to see him fly :)

coffeelovinmom said...

Why don't people get this concept? I have this problem too, I can add it to my reasons I don't answer..

coffeelovinmom said...

I'm so glad people are on my side here...I figured someone would say I'm being rude..

coffeelovinmom said...

Hate is such a strong word, but I agree!

Carri said...

I never check my messages. I will look at the caller ID and just call the person back, and the first thing they always ask is, "Did you get my message?" Yes, I did. Did I listen to it? Nope.

Jillian Wernick Livingston said...

I love this post!

I promise you are not alone! As a mother with three boys, that mute button on the phone can get confusing, so I rarely answer.

I'm a pain in the ass to my friends. Those who hang in there for me I would catch a grenade for.

I mean really, if they love me despite ALL of my quirks, than they must be outrageously special!!!

Miss Donna said...

unscheduled phone calls suck your time and you can never get it back. when i have to talk business, phone calls are put on my calendar like appointments - with time limits. my family and the couple of friends who do call have gotten used to me not answering on THEIR time and me calling back when it's convenient for me to talk. they are the ones who truly love me & don't question what's wrong with me.

Betty b said...

I pledge  allegiance to this post (lol) I have been vindicated. There are others who feel the same. Yes!

Kimberly said...

I don't answer the phone much either. I have caller ID but it still doesn't make me want to pick it up.

Connie Gruning said...

I'd rather go to the denist than answer the phone!!
Hi, You have such a cute site! I'm a new stalker!
I follow you on FB, GFC and Twitter
I hope you will follow back

Celeste Sann said...

THANK YOU! I needed to know that someone else in the world hates the phone. I've never enjoyed hearing it ring; I think it's intrusive. If I want to talk then I'll call you. I'm not trying to be rude it's just the way I guess I'm built. Tweet me, email me, or text me! But please, don't call OR worse knock on my door. You have a new non-calling follower here via Sunday Funday Linky!


chosenchaos said...

I HATE talking on the phone so I never answer mine either. Those that care about me send me a text first that says I have something to tell you please call when you can.

Amy said...

Since I've had my baby, its just hard for me to GET to the phone. Then sometimes I forget that someone called, and THEN forget to call them back. I really did not like having a house phone either. So I completely feel ya. There are more important things in life than answering the phone!

Kathy said...

Well the sister who is not talking to me would proably have the longest list of what is wrong with me!! I'm pretty sure of that, my mom might come in second! Lol!!! I am not that hot on answering the phone when all the kids are home, but, I have a 12 year old and it causes a physical reaction in him if I do not answer the phone because he is hoping that it is one of his friends calling, and, thankfully for him, we are running about 50/50 now!! Take care!!!

Laurel Emmons said...

I'm totally a phone-answerer, and love chatting on it. But fuck 'em, it's your phone, and unless the person calling decides to start paying the phone bill for you? It's there for YOUR use. Not theirs. Unanswer away!

Tonya said...

I don't do phones either. Text, tweet, plug stuff into my calendar, Scrabble? Yes. Talk? NO WAY!

coffeelovinmom said...

Coffee, yes! Let's win!

coffeelovinmom said...

Most times I trip over my words anyway..

coffeelovinmom said...

Why do I feel like I'm talking to the wrong people?

coffeelovinmom said...

We are getting to that age in our family too where the kids want to answer it in hopes of it being for them. I have a feeling I may have to conform a little..

coffeelovinmom said...

YAY! I loved having the baby excuse - I'm so glad people feel me on this for real!

coffeelovinmom said...

Yes some people get it

coffeelovinmom said...

Oh yes the pop-ins are a whole other kind of loathefest..intrusive, yes that is how I feel

coffeelovinmom said...

Have I told you I like the way you think??

coffeelovinmom said...

There is typically multiple messages waiting to be played and my husband is always like - you never listened to these from last week? nope...sometimes the message is enough and I don't need to call back, right?

Julie said...

I hate talking on the phone! Why can't people just message me on twitter? ;)

Sarcasm Goddess said...

Amen Sista! And there is NOTHING wrong with you. What the hell is wrong with everyone else? If I don't recognize the number, I don't answer. Period. I have never been a big phone talker. And we NEVER answered the phone growing up. My parents hated the phone. If you left a message and we wanted to talk to you, we would answer.

Babspinfrance said...

I hate, HATE talking on the phone! Isn't that why God created facebook and text messaging?

Kisha Patterson-Tanski said...

I was beginning to think that i was the only persons with some sort of phone-phobia. my husband doesn't even make me order pizza anymore.